Many years ago, Eveline Ardelean was married to a man named Shin. One year to the day she gave birth to an only child, a girl. Her desire was to name her daughter Esmiralda Flamorisa. This child was instead named FaeRuenShin. This is the story of her daughter, starting with one of the more important factors of her life. The first few years in which her mother was her protector, and abuser
Eveline was born to a half Irish half Romanian gypse named Daciana Cojocaru. At some point in her life she met and soon married a former Italian nobleman named Agostino Veneziano. The exact reason he fled from Italy is not known. After many years of marriage, they were blessed with a child. Eveline was born on April 15th, the exact middle of Spring according to Celtic tradition. She had her mother’s green eyes and her father’s dark brown hair. When she turned five, she chose the surname ‘Ardelean’ because she thought it sounded pretty.
Eveline was a very short woman. She stood at exactly five feet, had pale white skin, green eyes, and dark brown curly hair. She was well known for her feminine and curvy figure. She was a very loving and kind person, devout to her religion and family. She was a botanist, amateur doctor, wife, and eventual mother. She died February 15th 2011, the day after her daughter’s birthday and two days after her husband.
During her life she was known to lie face down in the dirt, talking with nature. She loved singing, and would talk to plants more than she would people. When asked why, she said ‘God is talking through the wind and the leafs catch His words. They whisper to me what He says, and I send messages back to Him.’ She still attended church services, but refused Catholicism. Her parents were able to convince her to keep her views to herself, and no harm came to her by fellow villagers. By the age of eight, she was a skilled self taught botanist and acted as the doctor of the village.
At age ten she found a teenager sexually torturing an animal in the forest she got most of her herbs. She beat him to death with a mace she carried for protection against aggressive animals. Several hours later she returned home after turning herself in to the local authorities. When questioned what happened to the animal (revealed to be caught rabbit), she informed them she performed a mercy killing and buried it by the river. The remains of the teen were found after being mostly eaten by wolves and a bear. No charges were pressed against Eveline. She spent sixteen days fasting and locked in her family’s barn. She punished herself one day for every year the teen was. She later told her father she mourned the loss of her innocence, not the life she had taken. She hoped God would forgive her, and watch over the rabbit’s soul.
Agostino taught Eveline how to fight like a man, and defend herself against them. He also taught her how to properly wield a mace. By her early teens she was respected and feared in her village. She only used lethal force against anyone who brought harm to another, and continued to be the village medic.
At fourteen Eveline left her village to travel the world. Her travels brought her to Spain a year later. There she made many friends, opened a floral shop, and met her future husband. Two weeks after meeting they entered a serious relationship, and one month afterwords married.
After her marriage she began to notice her father in-law taking a close interest in her. While closing her shop permanently so she may life and travel with her husband, her father in-law physically attacked her. She escaped with no injury by incapacitating him with one of her many herbal powders. She told no one until she became pregnant and met her mother in-law.
When my grandmother died, she left me a box of letters. In this box was a sixteen page letter detailing their entire conversation. She told my mother that my grandfather was an evil man. He was so bent on revenge he’d hurt anyone to get it. He was perverse, cunning, and cruel. My father couldn’t or wouldn’t see it, so it was up to her to protect what she carried inside of her. She said that I would be born like him if she didn’t do anything to prevent it.
Eveline went into labor on February 13th at 10:00 pm while aboard Shin’s ship. They dropped anchor on the shore of an Island that had been in his family’s for centuries. While venturing through the jungle to reach the family estate, she began giving birth at 11:45 pm. One February 14th at 12:01 am, her daughter was born while her husband acted as midwife. Eveline became unresponsive, stopped breathing, and didn’t move for exactly five minutes. When her husband went to close her eyes, she began breathing again and asked to hold her daughter. Her eyes changed from emerald to a dark green. He refused, and continued to his family’s estate.
Later that morning a fight ensued between husband and wife. He told her she was never to leave the house again, and she would nit be leaving the island ever. He left his only daughter with a woman he no longer recognized.
Modern doctors would say that Eveline most likely suffered from a form of postpartum psychosis, a possible inability to recognize her own child, and even a form of dissociative identity disorder. Her husband and grandmother had a much different explanation. They both believed that Eveline passed on her spirit to her daughter in childbirth, hoping whatever kindness she had in her would be given to her daughter. In doing so she sacrificed being able to hold, love, or even speak to her child. During the time she remained unresponsive, they both believed Eveline’s body became possessed by an evil entity that would interact with the child since she could not. I found evidence of both in letters written to me by my mother. She apologizes for hurting me and explains she could only stand back and watch as a monster tried to kill me. She begs for my forgiveness, and prays she was able to give me enough goodness to survive.
For three years Eveline, or this evil entity, physically and mentally tortured her daughter. The only pause in abuse came when her husband would return from his business travels. She silenced her daughter by telling her she’d kill Shin in front of her if she told anyone. The threat worked and FaeRuenShin suffered in silence. The abuse reached it’s climax when Eveline attempted to poison her daughter with opium. While her daughter recovered in her room, Shin and Eveline had an explosive argument downstairs. I came to find out later that my father had known about the abuse all along, but had no choice but to leave me with my mother.
This near death incident was not the reason for removing me from my mother’s care. In her final letter she wrote to me, she explained it was the only way she knew to save me. My grandfather had been visiting the estate regularly, despite my father threatening his life. The night my mother truly tried to kill me, he waited until my father left to chop wood to calm his nerves. My mother was busy packing things in my playroom, and didn’t notice my grandfather sneaking in. That night he had planned to begin molesting his three year old granddaughter.
It was a memory I had blocked out until a few years ago. I remember waking up and seeing him in my room. Something told me he wasn’t suppose to be there and I screamed as loud as I could. I continued to scream as he tried to climb into my bed. I remember my mom began beating him with a wooden club before he had a chance to do anything to me. I was terrified. I didn’t realize at the time she was saving me. I begged her not to beat me after she was finished with him. She screamed at me to go downstairs and then yelled for my father. I ran down the stairs and into the parlor, falling asleep in my father’s chair and holding onto the family bible. I woke up on his ship the next morning, heading for the mainland of South America.
I don’t hate my mother. I don’t dislike my mother. I honor and cherish her. Yes, she abused me. Yes, she tried to kill me. Yes, she loved me in her own way. No amount of hate I could ever harbor towards her would be worse than the feelings she described in her unmailed letters. I could never imagine what it would be like to stare out the looking glass of your own eyes, seeing yourself hurt someone you love so deeply, and not be able to do anything about it. Maybe she was mentally ill, maybe something evil did take her body so that she could make me the person I am today. Whatever you want to believe it doesn’t matter. This woman gave birth to a child that she would have done anything to save, and when she had to she finally became her protector. She spent the later years of her life in self imposed isolation in the Romanian mountains. Seeing her husband only once a year, and only seeing pictures and videos of her daughter. She felt her husband’s death, and died two days later of a broken heart. My only regret is that I will never have the chance to tell her I love her. Despite everything I respect her. I’ve forgiven her.
She was born Eveline Veneziano, she chose to become Eveline Ardelean, and she died Eveline Flamorisa. Daughter, wife, and mother. May she have found her way to heaven, so that I might be with her in the after. If her I spy from across the gorge, a tear I will not shed. It will have been her own unforgiven sin that banished her, and I will live on in the after, carrying her spirit inside me.
Most people that I’ve told about my mother have said that it’s just superstition that made my grandmother and father believe that something evil possessed my mother. I’m often mocked and made fun of when I tell them I believe it as well. All I tell them is this. If they were a child of any age, what would be better to believe. That their parent loved them so much that they chose to give them all the kindness inside them, making them susceptible to an evil entity possessing them and unable to control their actions, or that giving birth to them drove them insane. Insane enough to try and kill their own child. I live with the memory that my mother did what was best for me, and could not control herself because believing the other is not living at all.